bartman311's Xanga

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Sat, 29 Jul 2006 18:36:00 GMT

charo frightens me

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Sun, 09 Jul 2006 15:02:56 GMT

to shroom or not to shroom, that is the question
whether tis' nobler in the mind to eat the
caps and stems of outrageous fungus,
or to take arms against a sober reality, and by opposing, end it. Peak, come down, no more--and by come down to say we end the high and the thousand voices that our mind is heir to--tis' a consummation devoutly to be sought by me and my fellow brethren

Friday, July 07, 2006

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 20:27:27 GMT

like i can't stand looking at hillary swank's smile... and i can't

I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast

Thu, 22 Jun 2006 04:18:14 GMT

I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast

Not to say that I eat shit for breakfast,

but if i were to choose between appraising you and eating shit for breakfast,

I would choose the breakfast shit,

for you are like shit,

your stench,

your manner and consistency,

I would not touch you because than i would have some of you on me and i would say,

"ew, i've got you all on me. gross"

So i eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast,

in the most metaphorical and figurative way.

END

I want

Mon, 17 Apr 2006 04:04:05 GMT

I want: you ready for this?

I want: sex with the double mint twins.

-yeesssssss...s.s.s.s....

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Thu, 23 Mar 2006 06:15:15 GMT

so uh, chef died. whats up with that? anyone? anyone?

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 03:54:21 GMT

A Sense of Purpose

Once again I am thwarted by a deficit in attention mixed with a surplus of flashing lights. Today, I reached the lowest KO score on Super Smash Bros. I’m not sure what draws me to this game, but there are two things in life which I can’t seem to get a handle on: video games and sports. So I ask this of you, my fine audience: what the fuck? Honestly, who finds it funny in God’s heavenly kingdom that I lack the necessary kinesthetic intelligence for such activities? Assuredly, someone expects me to answer these questions; I hate to bust a nut, but they’re all rhetorical. I must tune my mind to video gaming techniques and hand eye coordination, for becoming great in these practices is important to me.

Now, we move onto a more gut-wrenching issue: my serious lack of motivation. A friend once said to me that musicians are lazy by nature. If I were to put my past on a television screen, I would see countless hours of a boy sitting on his ass with a guitar. He would be, like God, high and mighty (not so much mighty). As this young man’s ass grows excessively larger, so does the left hemisphere of his brain. Possibly destined to become a rockstar, the boy heightens his sense of apathy and lets his fingers coordinate to his ears—as opposed to his eyes. Screw video games and sports. I have higher purposes in life.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 05:38:08 GMT

bored as shit. I can't fall asleep, so I think I'll find some sort of antihistamine drug to bring my system down. I saw The Island, and it wasn't bad. Kudos Michael Bay...and Scarlet Johanson. Here are some random ass pictures to look at:

these two are my favorite

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 21:14:36 GMT

captains log.598847-

I'm stoned as hell. My mosh mix playlist on my ipod is playing enter sandman. I'm blasting the bose. War of the Worlds is on the university movie channel. I, don't know what to write about. Can't fuking think. this is hard.

out.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Sun, 13 Nov 2005 04:51:18 GMT

Auburn just beat us by one point. That sucks a good amount of dick, but I was never really a stickler for football. Honestly, I don't care as much my peers. I feel bad, but I don't care as much as my peers.

On a lighter note, I gotta find something to do tonight. This is my mission.